First 3 months

Wow! What a ride. So since my last post I’ve secured a position as music teacher for Lincolnshire Music Service delivering guitar, piano, and voice lessons along with PPA support and whole class tuition in primary schools. I’m currently visiting 10 different schools for the music service and I have one school 1 school that I teach as part of my SLMS. The bass gigs are trickling in and I’ve even performed as a solo pianist; a singer and as a guitarist. There’s a lot of travelling, but for the first time in many years I feel like I can teach music in the way I believe it should be taught, with an emphasis on creativity blended with development of technique. Roll on 2018.

My Love - new recording

https://soundcloud.com/steve-lowndes/my-love This song has a special meaning to me. It was the first song I wrote (I was 14). It's special because the lyrics are almost entirely written by mum. I found the sheet music I wrote for it whilst sorting out my music room and felt the need to record it. As far as I'm aware this is the only existing recording of the song. I hope you like it. The song is called My Love.

Goodbye stevelowndes.com

I'll be taking stevelowndes.com offline in the next couple of weeks. The site doesn't attract traffic and I don't have time to update it anymore. I intend to reduce my online presence this year to make it more manageable. Currently, N1M is getting most attention, but I still can be found on soundclick, SoundCloud, my facebook page and of course here on my blog. I'm seriously thinking of releasing some of the songs I recorded a couple years ago this year, but I'm not sure what sort of project it will be yet. It'll be weird not having the website after 12 years. Let's see what the next chapter brings.

Next Steps

I’m not sure who will read this so I’ll try to be brief and clear. Theddlethorpe has been a rollercoaster of an experience with as many highs as lows. I have an incredible respect for my primary colleagues as a result. It’s been a struggle to maintain my commitments to Skegness Silver Band and Steve Walker’s Big Swing Band. I’m getting more and more requests to perform and I’m also involved with the training band at Skeg Silver. Marking and planning takes a lot of my spare time as well. So I am in the process of making a new decision. Should I go it alone and resurrect my attempted music services or do I try to get back into secondary music teaching. My gut feeling is it’s time for the next step… So this is the plan (at the moment). From September I am considering becoming a professional musician once again. As an instrumental and vocal teacher. As a bassist. As a musical workshop provider. After much persuasion I’ve ditched the name Fret ‘n’ Clef (no one seemed to understand what it meant) and have simply gone for my name and what I offer. Steve Lowndes Music Services, SLMS for short. I would initially offer bass, piano, guitar, brass and vocal tuition. I will also offer theory teaching for those planning to go through the grades. Over the next few months I’ll also be developing the delivery of key stage 2 music workshops to support PPA or as one off workshops. I’m thinking Singing, Ukulele or Samba to start and maybe add African drumming. I’ll also be looking at delivering the national curriculum for smaller primaries. I’m keen to hear what people think of these plans and would welcome any suggestions.

More change...

Ok, looking back on my last few entries I know I must look like Mr. Indecisive! Well I probably am. The latest twist in my crazy 2015 tale occurred back at the end of November 2015. I didn't blog that in Easter, after making the bold decision to create Fret 'n' Clef I got offered a long term supply at Arthur Mellows Village College. Since paying the mortgage seemed to be of primary importance I took the job. It was probably the best place for me to mend and I thoroughly enjoyed being a simple music teacher until the Summer holidays. Fantastic head of department, wonderful children and real chance to teach high ability musicians up to A level.

There's always a but... This placement is no exception. The worst part of the job was the distance. 96 miles everyday and 3 hours driving. I had lots of time to think and plan the next steps. During this time I realised that I needed to plan my next steps. AMVC would have their teacher back in February and after a very lean period during the six week holiday, along with a change of timetable involving less music teaching, I needed to plan my exit. It was now that I hatched a plan that I'd had for many years, but never had the guts to do. Primary school teaching.

So I set about trawling the Internet for information on primary curriculum. I decided years 3 and 4 would be the best for a primary rookie and started applying. Application after application was rejected. Some graciously with sound advice, others just simply ignored. Mid-November saw a change. I had two interviews. The first was for year 5/6 at a biggish school in Boston. It was the first time I'd ever taught 9-11 year olds and I was surprised at their ability. Needless to say I didn't get the job, but the interview panel were lovely and gave me some excellent advice. By now I'd already instructed my agents to look for primary not secondary music to afford me experience in primary. I wasn't expecting a bite for quite some time. This brings me to the second interview.

Out of the blue, I got a call inviting me to interview at a little village school in Theddlethorpe, near Mablethorpe. I'd already driven past the school, but thought that I wasn't going to get an interview. It's significant to note, around the same time I'd had the most devasting news of my life. Mum passed away on 6th November and I was numb. I remember walking out of the interview asking, praying that mum would help me to get the job so that I could make her proud. I liked the place. It had its issues but I liked it. I think God heard my plea, because against all the odds I was offered a temporary contract. I had two days to make the biggest shift of my life in the week when we would say goodbye to mum.

The last two months have been the most challenging time of my life to date, both emotionally and mentally. I forgot to mention that at the same time I had been offered a pantomime in Bournmouth playing bass. I know I made the right choice for our family. I hope mum is looking down on me with pride. I miss mum more each day, but I feel I am starting a journey that Parkinsons took away from her. I want to be the best primary teacher I can for her and for my family. Let's see what happens next...

New business - Fret n Clef

I'm excited to announce that I am pooling all my experience as a teacher and performer and marketing it as Fret n Clef. It's a name that encompasses education with musical creativity. I will once again be performing as a bassist and also guitar vocalist, in addition to performing my own material should the occasion arise. I will also be developing a set of music workshops aimed at Primary schools to help them inspire young musicians and deliver KS1 and 2 music. I'm hoping to work in partnership with the Lincolnshire Music Support Service in this venture. In addition I will be teaching privately to people interested in bass, guitar, piano, voice or brass lessons. Check out my new website for updates.

www.fretnclef.com

Who am I?

A big question! I suppose many people ask that question of themselves at some point or other in their lives. I think maybe I've asked that question probably too many times. I try to reinvent myself so often. I seem to have travelled so far since those childhood days of wanting to be an engineer or architect. Music changed everything. Christianity changed even more. Musically I've played jazz, pop, rock, folk, classical, and many more. I guess you could say I'm a "Jack of all trades", but in truth I guess it's taken me years to realise the truth that I'm versatile. And the reason I'm versatile is so that I can help other fledgling musicians. I won't hide from the fact that my heart still desires to perform. I miss playing in orchestras, I miss the pop gigs at Butlins, I even miss the pub gigs sometimes. Last summer I went out to perform again. I only did two gigs and realised that it simply wasn't the same anymore.

So what do I do now? I play Eeb tuba in Skegness Silver Band. Yes I still have the big dreams, but I simply enjoy it. I get to be me for a few minutes. I get to parp away on a bass instrument, supporting the bottom end of the band. I still get frustrated with some of the members around me, but that soon leaves my thoughts as I fluff easy passages. I don't practice enough and wish I could find time a space to practice regularly. If I did though, I know what would happen next. I'd get ideas above my station and start to dream of being the best tuba player ever. Goodness, I'm such a dreamer. I know I have musical talent. But I also know that my best musical talent is to share my knowledge and experience. That is what I try to do everyday. That is why I'm changing job.

For the last two years and before I've been distracted from my calling, my vocation, my purpose. I made a decision to do something about it and it went wrong, so impulsively I determined to continue to do something about it. As a result in September I begin a job at an old school. I'm returning to Spilsby. I have questioned have I made a mistake. I have doubted my choice and the motivation behind my choice. It all comes back to the title question... Who am I? The answer to that question is an experienced and talented music educator. For too many years I've played at being management. For too many years I've allowed myself to be distracted by things that don't concern my talents. Even when I was specialist status leader for music, I allowed other priorities to distract me and lost a grip on what I do best. Teach music.

So now I go back to basics. I will be head of music. Sole music teacher. I have no desires to empire build. I have no desires to climb the management ranks. I will build my department and I will give my students the musical experience they deserve. As I get older, I will remember daily who I am and what impact I have on those who surround me. Yes, I'll still do the occasional gig and get the bass guitar out every now and then. I will probably continue to write songs. But now is the time to focus on who I am not what I want to be. I hope the coming months and years will find that my proudest moments are those watching others enjoy making music rather than glory seeking for myself.

It will soon be time to say farewell to William Lovell, and I will do so with a heavy heart. Today I look to the future. I wish every blessing on the students and staff of William Lovell and success to Lyndsey who will lead music when I leave. It has been a place that I have learnt so much about me and those I work with and I will cherish many happy memories.

Jack! Meet Jack. Lego honour our special hero.

What an amazing weekend it's been! Just 6 weeks ago we found out that, amongst thousands of entries, Jack had been selected by Chat magazine to be a real life Lego hero. My previous post shared about his event Run2Remember13. It was a massive success and Jack helped to raise £3,400 for St. Barnabas Hospice Lincolnshire. It captured the imagination of many people. LegoLand and Chat chose to reward his hard work by treating him (and us) to a fabulous three days at LegoLand Windsor. It was such an honour to see our special little man unveil his statue whilst ITV and Chat recorded the event. We know Steph would be shouting how proud she is of her special little soldier from the rooftops and only wish she could be here to see this amazing tribute to her marvellous son. There are too many people to thank individually so I'll wrap up by saying a massive thank you to all those who made Jack feel like a V.I.P. over the last three days.
Just one of the many news websites that published the story.

Brave Jack Runs To Remember His Mummy

Seven years ago in June, ten year old Jack Covill-Lowndes lost his mummy Steph to cancer. The charity St. Barnabas gave a great deal of care and kindness, not just to Steph, but to all the family. Words cannot express how grateful the family were to them in a time of need. Jack feels that should other families be in the situation they were in, that St. Barnabas would be there for them too.

Jack has wanted to take part in charity walks for some time and so he has decided to organise one of his own – a run to remember!

The event is taking place on Saturday 8^th June, 2013 at the Magdalen School field in Wainfleet. Registration starts from 10 am and the run begins at 11.00 am. We are asking participants to pay an entry fee of £3 per person or £10 for a family of 4 (which must include at least one adult), for which they will be able to run, walk or crawl three times around the school field and earn a medal supplied by Running Imp. There is also the option to raise more money by collecting sponsorship using an official sponsor form from St. Barnabas.  Jack is hoping to attract a large number of people to this event. He has planned to have a BBQ, which has been very kindly supported by Tesco and Kirk’s butchers of Skegness. A bouncy castle has been provided by Roy Oldershaw, and there will also be side stalls and a raffle with many exciting prizes including prizes from: Lego.com, Rand Farm, Natureland, Tower Cinema and Grand Central of Skegness, East Kirkby Aviation Centre, Elton John memorabilia, a collectible bear from Oldrids of Boston, and many more that are being donated daily.

To find out more, please contact Jack at run2remember13@gmail.com or visit www.facebook.com/run2remember13 , alternatively, turn up at 10 am on the day and register. You can also donate or register online using www.justgiving.com/run2remember13 and even justTEXTgiving by texting BARN73 £3 to 70070. 

St Barnabas fundraiser, Chris Fox says, “It is truly wonderful of Jack to want to organise an event for St Barnabas. He is truly inspirational. I hope his friends and local community can get behind him 100% to make this event as special and memorable as jack wants it to be.”

Jack said “I want to help St Barnabas because they helped me by helping my mum.

I helped her a lot with my family and was only 3 when she went to heaven. She is my shining star.

So lets raise lots of money to say thank you.”

All money raised from this event will go towards supporting St Barnabas Hospice.   St Barnabas is an independent, local charity caring for over 5800 people a year who are living with a life-limiting illness in Lincolnshire.  It supports adult who have complex symptoms and pain which needs to be controlled by St Barnabas’ team of specialist health professionals. St Barnabas offers the patient and their family’s hospice care and support via: in-patient unit, community ‘hospice at home’ service, day therapy & outpatient clinics, physiotherapy, occupational therapy & complementary therapy, welfare advice & support and bereavement support. All the services are free. St Barnabas needs to raise over £3.1m a year to provide its support and care. Over 850 volunteers play a crucial role in the charity’s success.

Now and Then

It seems so long since I wrote a song. It's always the same. Too busy! Not enough quiet time! No inspiration! Exploring a new style!

It's all a smoke screen. I can hide behind all of those excuses but the fact is I haven't written anything because I haven't tried. I haven't tried because I felt disillusioned in my own musicianship and ability to write a song. A few weeks ago I felt a stirring inside and I knew the signs - a song was on its way. I've been fighting it for a few months now and during the beginning of the half term break I took advantage of a couple of hours and out poured the song. Now and then is really about our relationship with God. It's recognising the good things that God has done for us rather than focus on the grime of the world around us. Is about rising out of the ashes refreshed and renewed. It's about having scars and not being afraid to let them be seen. The recording is only a demo. I recorded it on an iPad using garageband app so it's a little raw. I guess it would easy for you to read for yourself, so here are the lyrics. Click on the title of the song to hear it in soundcloud.

Now and Then
Steve Lowndes 21 February 2013

Now and then, when my heart is aching
Now and then, when my dreams are breaking
And I'm weary of this world
And I try to keep on going
Even though I see nothing growing
And it's such a heavy load

I know that I get blind to all
The blessings in my life
And still you remind me you made me who I am

You, you are my hearts desire
Your grace is so much more than I deserve
All my dreams are filled with love
That bandages my pain and heals my aching heart.

When a prayer seems unanswered
I'll carry on and keep believing,
That you hear my every thought.
And you know my heart is yearning
So I'll wait until the time is right
To see your glory flow

And when I stand before your throne
And meet you face to face
I know you'll remind me you choose me by your grace.

You, you are my hearts desire
Your grace is so much more than I deserve
All my dreams are filled with love
That bandages my pain and heals my aching heart.

Guesting with "The Plunge"

It is very great pleasure to be able to help out one of the rock groups from my school. The Plunge are four talented year 10 (going into year 11) students: Savannah Tyson, lead vox; Denva Fawkes, lead guitar and vox; Aiden Richards, Bass; and Mathew Barker, Drums. They made their debut public performance outside the the confines of the school a couple of weeks ago at Boston United's Community Day and wowed the crowds with their talent and energy. So much so that they were asked to perform as part of the Pilgrim Lounge's Beer Festival over the August Bank Holiday weekend.

Unfortunately, Savannah has been suffering with the vocalists nightmare - bad throat - for the past few weeks and has been advised by the doctor to not sing whilst her voice recovers. Naturally the she was mortified and the band prepared to cancel the gig. So being the dope that I often am I volunteered to step and and sing any songs she couldn't manage so that the "show could go on"!!! I'm hoping that Savannah will find enough voice to sing a few if not all of the set but failing that I've been learning the stuff that I've heard the teenagers perform for the past few years. We'll be doing stuff from The White Stripes, Green Day, Kings of Leon, The Killers and more. It's an out and out rock set!

So tomorrow will be a challenge for me. I hope that Savannah feels well tomorrow, but I'm ready to step in and be an Old teenager.

If anyone is interested, it'll be at the Pilgrim Lounge, which is at Boston United football ground at 6pm for about 30 minutes or so. See you there!

My new acquisition

How happy am I? Went to pick-up my new guitar today. Extremely happy with and can't wait to make some serious noise when I plug it into my Bandit, which foolishly I left at school with all my leads (DOH!).

It's a Squier Silver Series Stratocaster which is believed to have been created in 1993. I did a bit of digging on the interweb and discovered these are no ordinary squier guitars, they are a bit special, hence the SIlver Series logo. It plays like a dream. Not necessarily the colour I would have chosen and a few knocks here and there, but that's just cosmetics as far as I'm concerned. Bizarrely Monro, the band I play with, has chosen black and red for it's colours, so the guitar will go well with our gear.

Next gig is 6 May in Southport so I'm looking forward to trying it out in public. Meantime, if anyone knows a good drummer about 40ish years old that wants to join a 3-4 piece blues band in Skegness give me a shout.

What was I thinking...

Ever done something that you thought was a good idea at the time then regretted it afterwards? Well that was me a few months ago. Having had to quit the double bass a couple of years ago, I decided to take up a different instrument. First the trombone and then the Tuba! I like the tuba. Absolutely no reason why I like it, but I like it. So I decided I'd give myself a challenge on it to make me spend time learning how to play it properly. That challenge was Grade VI ABRSM. Foolishly I thought it wouldn't be a problem.

So I got my music and attempted a practice regime. I was playing weekly with the Skegness Silver Band which certainly builds up stamina and experience. Everything was going swimmingly except one thing! Try as I might I couldn't memorise the scales. I can read them fluently without mistakes. But every time the music goes away my brain goes blank. I tried monotonous repetition. I tried writing them out. I included them into every practice. I even went through the fingerings whilst driving to work every morning (on the steering wheel I hasten to add). So come the day of the exam I was beginning to feel the queasiness of a nervous teenager attempting his grades for the first time. 

So the exam! The pieces had some silly mistakes but were generally ok. Then came the dreaded scales. Oh dear!!!! As I expected my mind went blank. First scale, the dreaded F sharp major. I did ok at that but a bit hesitant. Then he asked for F sharp harmonic minor which isn't even on the syllabus. Panic swept over me as I tried to explain to him it was G sharp minor on the syllabus fool wed by more panic when I couldn't remember it. I struggled through that scale - barely. Then he asked for "A" chromatic 2 octaves - I crawled my way to the top and got lost on the way down. He took pity on me and asked for a couple of arpeggios and a diminished seventh. By now I was almost a gibbering wreck, convinced I'd failed. Fortunately for me the aural tests were second nature (there is an advantage to being a music teacher).

The results should be published on Tuesday next week!!!!! It's funny because secretly I was feeling confident in the build up to the exam and was hoping to get a merit with a possible distinction. I walked out of the exam room praying for a pass and am convinced I'll be a couple of marks off a pass. The most annoying thing was, at Silver band that night as I was warming up I played the whole "A" chromatic scales from memory without mistakes. The next day I began practising my pieces again, expected to have to take a re-sit in the not to distant future.

My advice? Chase your dreams, but prepare yourself for the fact that to achieve a dream will take graft and possible heartache.

Podcast Episode 1 - The Puzzle of Life

Here I go with a new thing. Having recently recorded two presentations for Eternal Radio I decided it would be a good idea to share them as a podcast here on my website. The first is the recently aired recording of my thoughts on the Puzzle of Life, which features A Sacrifice of Praise from the Design for Life album recorded back in 2005. It'd be great to get some feedback from this new venture.

Click on the player below to listen to the podcast.

Broadcast on Eternal Life Social Network

I pleased to announce that Eternal Life Social Network will once more be featuring me on the PowerHouse show on Eternal Radio. This time I'm sharing a message called "The Puzzle of Life" which features "A Sacrifice of Praise" throughout the message.

I hope you get chance to join me by listening at Eternal Radio to find out more. The broadcast is 9pm GMT Thursday 19th January 2012.

Jack's poetry

Jack recently brought home his "Big Write" book from last year at school. I felt so proud when I read it to see how creative our little man is. but when I came to one of his poems I was more than proud, I was impressed. So impressed that I asked Jack if he'd let me post this poem on my website. So here it is...

Listen!

by Jack Covill-Lowndes (aged 8)

Listen!
(What can you hear?)
The crashing waves
of a distant sea
A faraway bird
calling to me...

Listen!
(What can you hear?)
The slow slither of a
slimey snail.
The wind whirling through the
turbine sails...

Listen!
(what can you hear?)

Teacher's Strike!!!!

So I'm a teacher. Comparatively I understand that teaching is one of the lowest paid professions. However, most teachers I know teach because they love teaching. Love sharing the future with their students. Love seeing the personalities grow from childhood into responsible adults. I don't know many teachers that teach because they're in it just for the money (although I expect that these people exist). Teachers live extremely busy lives. Often at the expense of their family life or personal pursuits. Again I'm sure there are plenty of other professions that work more than they rest. Contrary to popular belief a teachers day is rarely over at 3:45pm. I know many of my colleagues spend precious moments with their families and then set to work shortly after they've tucked them in bed. I suppose sometimes I do this too. So why this rant.

Well, simply put my colleagues may be going on strike on Wednesday. Because as a result of the nations austerity measures the government have decided to make savings by affecting public sector workers pensions. Effectively charging us more with a lower return. One fact has me gobsmacked! They expect me to be able to keep inspiring teenagers with current and relavant knowledge until I'm 68 years old. I can't imagine being able to entertain and inspire children when I'm that old. And why do they have the right to to take away my hard earned twilight years to spend them with my beloved wife Tamara and Jack with his future family. It just seems so incredulous that an arbitary number is thrown into the mix without considering the impact on people's lives.

I remember vividly the teacher's strike back in the 80's. I remember it because I was one of the students who was massively hit by the strike action (as many of my generation were too). I'm not even sure if the teachers realised what a long term effect it had on students like me. I deal with students who seem disaffected daily and as a team we find ways to inspire them and help them to develop self-confidence by building their self-esteem. At 15 years old I was expected to be a straight "A" student. In the same year all of the teachers who inspired me and made me feel like I could achieve good things went on strike. To begin with we thought it was a bit of a lark. But slowly things got progressively worse. Our relationships with these trusted souls broke down. Why weren't they their to teach us. What had we done that made them so angry. Teenagers don't often understand politics. My response was to switch off! I figured if they don't care about me then why should I care about them. My grades dropped, my attitude changed, I became disinterested and disillusioned by education as a whole and swore to never become a teacher even though my mum spent her whole life working towards that one goal. I truly only did "A" levels and went to college to stop my family pestering me.

What scares me is what effect is this going to have on our children. The young lives I encounter daily. If I stand with my union colleagues to shout at the government that we won't tolerate being mistreated then my students will suffer. They too may become disillusioned and angry. However, if I choose to protect the students I teach by offering them stability, then my family could suffer. It makes me so angry that a small number of politicians get to play God like this so often and seldom think of the consequencies. Or if they do then finance outweighs compassion. We live in a democracy yet it often feels like a dictatorship.

I think it would be wrong for me to state whether I'm striking or not on this blog for many reasons. Whatever the outcome I want my students to know that they are important to me and want them to also be aware how important my families future is too. Those who know me closest know what I will be doing on Wednesday. What would you do in my circumstances? "To strike or not to strike" that is the question.

Family Day Out

Baby seal chillin' at Donna Nook

I love spending time with my special people and today was one of those special days. Tamara has been poorly all week and I've had one of those insanely busy weeks. Loads to do at school and brass band rehearsals 4 nights this week. It's all taken its toll on both my poorly girl and Jack who's missed his bedtime stories from me. So this morning when we woke I expected a day at home giving Tamara chance to build some strength and Jack time to play with me. However, Tamara had other ideas. Not shopping! She gently but firmly encouraged me to take us to Donna Nook to go and see the annual spectacular that is the birth of hundreds of baby seals. None of us have ever been before and I was intrigued. So after my protestations about Tamara being out in the cold off we went, armed with a camera and a football.

On the way there we decided to stop at a fish and chip shop for some lunch, We saw Dolphin chippy in Sutton on Sea and enjoyed a lovely meal there. Then on to Donna Nook.
I really didn't expect what we saw when we got there. The first thing that struck me was just how many cars were there. When we finally found a space to park we ventured over the dunes. The strangest sound emanated over the dunes and I begun to realise just how many seals were there. We got to the fence that separated us from the stars of the moment and marvelled at the sight of hundreds of seals with their pups littered over the vast expanse of beach. I wondered how long it would take a seal to waddle the great distance from the sea to their nurturing place. And so many people came to watch with us. It did make me feel a bit strange and I wondered how the seals felt about us staring at them. My question was soon answered as we walked a little further down the pathway and we saw a young pup looking extremely content lying on his/her back. I think the little thing must have been dreaming as it jumped and jerked in its sleep. Jack was fascinated by the little creature and watched waiting to see it move. When it eventually opened its eyes it seem to look straight at us then shuffled around and promptly broke wind, which sent chuckles down the line of onlookers. All three of us thoroughly enjoyed this amazing spectacular and I'm sure we'll go back next year.

Now it was Jack's request to play football on the beach, so we jumped into the car after negotiating the dunes once more, and off to Mablethorpe beach. I love to see Jack running around and laughing and jumping with joy. It's such a delight to see him smile. I remember a line from one of Michael Cards songs that reads, "I would wander weary miles, would welcome ridicule my child, to simply see the sunrise of your smile..." How true those words are. Both Tamara and I feel so lucky to be able to share our lives with this fabulous gift of love that we see in Jack.

My day ended with a performance at New Day Christian Centre in Skegness. I had to leave my poorly girl and sleepy boy behind which left me feeling a little sad, but I had a fabulous time with the good folk at New Day who were busy raising money for The Storehouse a new home for the New Day fellowship. I hope they enjoyed the music I shared with them and wish them success in their vision to be a centre for revival in Skegness.

When I got home I was expecting to see my wonderful family watching the X-factor, instead Jack was fast asleep in bed and Tamara was dozing, watching the X-factor in our bedroom. I am such a lucky man to have these two special people in my life. They give me joy daily and I can't imagine being without them. I loved our family day out. I long for our next special day like today.

R.I.P. Jerry

Got home from our shopping trip today and after getting our tea and settling Jack down for the night I went to give our pet guinea pig Jerry some attention. I've recently bought him an inside run so he can "watch the telly" with us. It's funny how pets become such a big part of the family. So as is my habit I went across to talk to him. The usual response is a couple of squeaks and a look at the edge of the cage with expectant eyes for either some fuss or some nice green treats. Unusally he didn't reply. On closer inspection he didn't seem to be moving. But heart broke when I realised he had died. Next January he would have been 5. He's been an excellent pet and we will miss him dearly. As I write Jack doesn't know, so I'm not looking forward to telling him. So goodbye Jerry Berry, it's been a pleasure having you in our family - you will be sadly missed.

20 Years :)

This week saw one of those momentous days. On Wednseday 26th October 1991 Tamara made me the happiest man in the world. This week we got to celebrate our China (20th) wedding anniversary. We went to Blackpool for a few days to celebrate and the three of us had a fabulous time doing all that holiday maker stuff. On Wednesday (our anniversary) we went to Toast in Blackpool and had a delicious meal. We went up the refurbished tower and visited the Tower Circus which was truly amazing. Jack loves Mooky the Clown. We went to Sealife - another place that has improved greatly. All this topped off by stayng at the Kensington Hotel which had some the most side-splitting entertainment I've seen in a while.

All in all a great way to remember one of the most special and important days of my life. Thank you Tamara for continuing to make me the happiset man in the world. I love you more each day.